Horror Movie

I have always heard people say, “I love going to the movies by myself.” With a somewhat productive day behind me I decide to be a big girl and try it for the first time this afternoon…even though I was hesitant.  There was nothing I really cared to see in the theater but with the Montana rate of $5 for the matinee I thought why not? I even treated myself to refilling our bucket that an aggravating teenager talked me into buying when Bare and I went to see True Grit (great movie by the way).  The amazing deal was you pay around $8 for this completely oversized bucket and then it only cost $2.50 to refill it for the rest of 2011.  I thought it was a great deal at the time…when there were 2 of us to share it.  Kind of regretting my decision right now…no, I didn’t eat the entire bucket, but I did decide to go with the large diet pop (that’s Montana talk) as well.

I arrived at least 10 minutes before the start time…Bare would be so very proud of me.  We are ALWAYS the first to arrive as to get the best seats and so we do not miss any previews.  There was no one else in the theater, so I sat right in the middle…so far it was perfect!!  Then the “others” starting arriving, most of them arriving late and one guy standing up in right in front of me…taking his precious time, taking off his jacket and checking his text messages before he sat down.  THEN…the “ONE” arrived.  As he walked by my seat he kicked it…oh great.  He didn’t sit directly behind me, but three seats to the left of me…just enough where I can turn and give him “the look” several times throughout the movie…and yes, he deserved it…so here’s one of my miserable movie experiences EVER…

·         He started off by eating his popcorn like it was an apple…I didn’t know someone could make that much noise with popcorn.

·         He laughed the ENTIRE movie…the kind of laugh like Eileen’s date had on Seinfeld that time…and he repeated all the lines he thought were hilarious throughout the movie.

·         He sang most of the songs really loud including "Every Breath You Take" by The Police…yes, I turned and looked at him at this point.

·         Then I almost LOST it…he chose a point in the movie when it’s really quiet…and not once but three times…he “coughed up a phlegm wad” ( used that term because my husband hates when people say “hock a loogie”).  Yes, at that point I was horrified for the poor girl with him, and I am trusting that she ends it TONIGHT!!

·         To finish off this great first experience, as Adam Sandler is telling Jennifer Aniston how he feels…so predictable of course, the “ONE” decides to guess at the punch line and say it really loud before Adam does…like he figured out the movie and the rest of us didn’t…yes, I looked at him again!!

The movie FINALLY ended…Bare and I usually are the last to leave the theater, but tonight I did not have the patience.  I practically ran to my car and flew out of the parking lot towards my apartment…even deciding to run a redlight in the process.  I just wanted to get as far away from that guy as possible.  I’m not sure if I’m worked up due to that guy alone or if my large diet pop added to my agitation.  All I know is it will be awhile before I go to the theater by myself again.